After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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