I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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