I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
