Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
