goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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