ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
they're like a gay fantastic four
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
