i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
sex in a hospital.. check
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
