we're blogging at a bar
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
