I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
