Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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