haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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