: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
