At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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