The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I need to align my fucking chakras
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
