Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
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