So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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