seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
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