She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
