Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
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