This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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