This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
