i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Randomize
