That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize
