kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
