so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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