Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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