New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
