nut hugger
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Terrible idea I love it
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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