So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
