you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize