I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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