small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Semen is not good for contacts.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
