This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
