i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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