careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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