I want to have your abortion
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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