mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
i think im in europe. pls send help
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
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