Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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