Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
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