Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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