i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
