I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
