what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
