I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
