I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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