Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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