the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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