i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
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