YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Randomize
