wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
